The Journey to Joy

Have you ever woken up one day and realized that you really haven't been living your life, but drifting through it? Sort of a perpetual never ending cycle of going through the motions on auto pilot, showing up at all the right places, fulfilling commitments and responsibilities, trying to make sure you are here for all the 'moments' but missing the mark completely? Me to. I'm here now actually. I'm not exactly sure how or when I ended up here, but I have a feeling it's like that for many people. You stay busy with life, family, work, that one day you look up and realize while you are busy checking off to do lists and fueling yourself with coffee that you really aren't enjoying your life, not really being in the moments that you are trying to make sure you don't miss, that somewhere along the way you have lost your joy, your, peace, your drive, and even your goals. I get that. I am living that. Take this blog for instance. It's been four years since I updated it. I wish I had four years of great updates. To be fair, it hasn't been all bad. There's been a lot of great things happen and new experiences. But deep down, I can feel it. I have lost my joy, my happiness, and my will.

You think there has got to be more to life than this, why can't I just pull myself out of this funk? Well, I'm no expert by any means, but I figure this didn't happen overnight, so it's going to take time to crawl back out from under the rock that I have found myself. Sometimes it's easy to think that if circumstances were different, then happiness would naturally follow. While our circumstances do have some bearing on how we feel, they do not have the right to dictate how we respond to whatever challenges come our way. The truth of the matter is that somewhere along the way, I gave up. On myself, my family, my marriage, my goals, and my own happiness. It was easier to check all the boxes and go through the motions rather than admit the truth. I let myself go, I stopped caring about my health and watched the scale climb. My marriage is hanging on by a very thin thread. My kids have lost their minds....teenage years are no joke. Our finances are laughable. My walk with God has become an afterthought. Don't get me wrong, I attend church, I read my verses and listen to my Christian radio and it sounds great in the moment...but it's the application where the train falls off the track.

It's in moments like these I realize how far I have strayed from the woman that I want to be, the wife, the Mom, the friend. Somehow I have to get my motivation back, my heart, my moxie. I don't know how 2018 is going to pan out. You see, throughout my life I have learned to be the 'fixer' in my relationships. If someone I cared about had a problem, I would jump in and do everything I could to rectify the situation. It didn't matter how big or small the problem, it was my personal mission and responsibility to right the ship so to speak. It's funny how things work out sometimes though. The season that I am in I am realizing just how small I am. I can't control every situation, I can't fix every problem. 

Will my marriage my make it? Will my rebellious teenager ever accept authority and stop acting out? Will we get our finances under control? I don't know the answers to these fears, but I do know that I can't keep going on like this. Truth be told, I don't know why God placed me on this Earth or what His plan is for my life. I've always felt a slight disconnect and the fear has always been I'm not enough. The funny thing about fear is that I think it is a precursor to a life on autopilot. You are too afraid to fail so you never try. You shut yourself out, keep a guard up around your heart, and just drift aimlessly through your life.

As I write this, I know there has to be others like me. Worn out Mommas, wives, fathers, husbands or even friends. I wish I could say that I have the answer to lift your spirits and fuse life back into each of us. The truth is that I don't. I do know though, that whatever 2018 may bring, I must begin with myself. I can't help anyone else if I don't take care of myself first. The good thing about a New Year is that it's a chance to try again and that's what I intend to do. I've always made New Year's resolutions and failed miserably at them so this year I'm taking a different approach. Our church's Woman's Director gave me a great idea to come up with a word instead of a resolution. She would pray to receive her word and when she receives it she spends the next year digging into her Scriptures and incorporating that word into her prayer life, her teachings, and her daily life. I thought I didn't have anything to lose, so why not give this a shot. I mean, hey, you can't lose what you don't have right?

I prayed for my word. I wish I could say I had some divine intervention and I knew that God had spoke to me. The truth is, I'm not sure if God gave me my word for the year or if it was just happenstance. To be fair, my prayers have lacked a little heart lately...ok...maybe a lot of heart. It was one night alone in my living room with everyone asleep and the only light on was the Christmas tree. Usually, this quietness would bring me peace and hope for the season. It is one of my favorite things to do during the holiday season. However, this year, the familiar scene didn't bring out hope, but rather discouragement and despair. I began to pray for my word and asked God to let me know without a shadow of doubt that it was Him speaking and not my own mind working. Nothing. Just the stillness of the room. Defeated, I gave up. As I opened my eyes I saw the painting my daughter had done in Children's Church. It said 'Joy'. Well. There's something missing from my life I thought.

I decided that this will be my word for 2018. That is my goal. I want to fuse joy back into my life. No matter the circumstance, or what storm may come. This will be the focus, the tone, the desired outcome for this upcoming year. I've spent far too much time watching life pass me by, letting the things that I can't control determine how I feel and I have nothing to show for it. I've got a feeling that this undertaking isn't going to be easy. Remember, Biblically, our fight is never against flesh and blood, but according to Ephesians 6:12 it's against "evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places". That tells me this isn't going to be a walk in the park. It's going to require digging deep, fighting with all you've got, and stepping out in faith. It's not going to be easy. But I think if I can make it to the other side of this, it will be worth it.

I almost created a new blog for this post. One where I could write anonymously and share how this turns out this year. The ups and downs, the victories and the challenges, because I know they both will come. I figured if I was anonymous, I could save face. I could keep my 'game face' on that all is ok. It would have been easier. But nothing worth gaining is usually ever easy. I realize that I can't grow and hide at the same time. Maybe someone reading this can relate and it will help others realize they aren't alone. For others, they may think I have lost my mind. That's ok to. Wherever you are in your journey, I pray that you will find joy, peace, and fulfillment. That's what I'll be searching for.

Till next time,

Jerri

My 24 Day Challenge

If you are anything like most of America you spend the majority of your time hustling from one activity to the next, whether that be keeping up with your kids, your work or school schedule, or even just the busy demands of keeping your house in order. Chances are you spend so much time just getting through your day, you end up making a lot of unhealthy choices or feel like you have no energy.

I have three children who keep me very busy as well as going to school full time, and for me, it seemed that I would just barely making it through my day. I knew my weight was a problem, but dieting seemed so hard and I always felt limited. I tried so many fad diets and just could not stick with anything long term. Eleven months ago, on my daughter's birthday in fact, I was yet again trying another crazy diet and just like the rest of them, I was miserable and knew there had to be something better. I was currently 185 pounds, at risk for diabetes, and constantly tired. I felt that instead of actually living my life, I was slowly watching it go by.

Thankfully, that very day I was introduced to Advocare and their 24 Day Challenge by a local business owner of an indoor bounce house where I had taken my daughter to play. I was a bit skeptical as I had tried so many things before that hadn't worked, what was to say this would be any different. The very first thing that stood out to me was that the owner was not pushy or had a sales pitch all ready to go but rather listened to me and where I was in my life and what my needs were. Instead of giving me a quick presentation and then asking me to place an order, he just explained what had worked for him, sent me home with a sample of Spark, and encouraged me to do my own research on the company as well.

This sat well with me, because I absolutely hate the feeling of being pressured into anything and wanted to take my time and really take a look at the company. Coming home I tried the Spark, which is Advocare's energy drink. I was floored, the taste was amazing and for the first time in a long time, I actually felt perked up! Encouraged, I researched the company and decided to give the challenge a try.

That decision was one of the best decisions I could have ever made for my health. In my first challenge, I lost 17 pounds in 24 days. Fast forward to today, eleven months later and  I am down 50 pounds!! That's right...you read that correctly, 50 pounds! I started at 185 pounds and I am currently 135 pounds. The transformation is incredible in my outward appearance, but aside from that, I am for the first time in my life at a healthy height and weight ratio. On top of that, I have completely eliminated my risk of diabetes which is major, as this disease runs in our family. Looking at myself eleven months ago I was overweight, unhappy, prone to diabetes and exhausted all the time, and now I have energy not to just get through my day, but to live and enjoy each moment!

 As you can see, the picture on the left is my before picture where I weighed in at 185 pounds and climbing. At this point, I was wearing I size 17/18 pants and usually a 2XL top. The picture of me on the right is my after picture in which I weigh 135 pounds. I am in the dressing room at Walmart trying on a size 5 pair of pants and a medium top that FIT!! Never before have I ever been able to fit in a size 5, so naturally I was beyond excited!


I'm so grateful that I was introduced to Advocare because now I have added quality years to my life and can be a much better Mom and set healthy examples to my children. I am so excited to share my success with others because I know that there are so many out there who have been in my shoes and are looking for something that works.

The beauty of the 24 Day Challenge is it is not just for those that want to lose weight! It can be customized for you and your goals! Let's face it, not everyone is the same, so naturally, everyone will have different goals! For some maybe it is a weight issue or weight management, for others you may be searching for a way to increase your energy, improve your general health or vitality, or just up your sports performance.



For a long time, I had given up setting goals because I couldn't face continually failing myself, but now, I have this inner pride of seeing what I really am capable of doing and love finding new ways to challenge and push myself to new levels of success.

Take some time today to start dreaming again, figure out what your goals are, and look into Advocare and the 24 Day Challenge. It may be just what you are looking for! If you have any questions, concerns, or need anymore additional information please don't hesitate to contact me either on my blog, or through my Advocare site!

I look forward to helping you reach your goals!!

Finding Fido: The Right Dog For Your Family

With Christmas fast approaching, many children have a new puppy at the top of their wish list for Santa Claus to bring them.  Although a new puppy in the house may delight your children on Christmas morning and provide lots of fun, adding a new member to your family is a decision that should not be impulsively made.  Many families purchase or adopt a puppy around Christmas and then later realize they are in over their heads when that sweet puppy grows up to a giant eating machine that cannot stop bouncing off the walls, herding your children, or creating a minefield of holes in your backyard.

            Currently, according to the Humane Society of the United States, forty-seven percent of all American families own at least one dog.  If you are looking to add a dog to your family, it can be very tempting to visit the local shelter and pick out the cutest one that you see available.  Unfortunately, this is one of the common pitfalls that families make when choosing a dog.  Even if that little ball of fur is adorable, it does not mean that it will be the right dog for your family.  Fortunately, there is a solution to finding the right dog and it is as easy as 1-2-3!

The first step is assessing your home life.  This means taking a look at all the factors a new dog would have to experience in your home and figuring out what you expect from a dog.  Things to take note of would be what is the activity level in your home?  Are you a family that is on the go a lot, spending a lot of time outdoors, or would you classify your family as the all American couch potato?  Are there small children in the home?  Other pets such as a cat or even another dog.  Other important things to consider are where you live.  For instance, if you live in an apartment or a condo, then you may not want to consider a very large or high-energy dog such as a Border Collie or German Shepherd.

Second, you need to do your research.  I know, the word research brings out a groan in us all, but it is vital to finding a dog that will fit to your family’s unique needs and environment.  This can be done one of two ways.  You can opt to research dog breeds on your own or speak to a professional such as a veterinarian or dog behaviorist for recommendations.  If you opt to do the research on your own, a great place to start is the American Kennel Club.  The AKC can give extensive information on the many breeds that are available.  Things to take into consideration are the dog’s temperament, typical personality traits, energy levels, growth, and prey drive.  This will provide you with the insight that you need to determine if you want a dog that can run and keep up with an active family, or if your family is looking more for a snuggle buddy.  In addition, prey drive can be very beneficial if you already have smaller pets in the home such as a cat, ferret, etc.  Paying close attention to the approximate growth of a dog is very important because not every family is thrilled with the idea of one day having a 100 plus pound shedding machine that has just stretched out in your spot on the couch. If you choose to speak to a professional, they can give you a few pointers, although it is important to remember that you know your family the best.

Lastly, when you have chosen the breed that is right for you, it is time to go find your dog. There are two choices when searching for your dog, purchase from a breeder, or adopt a dog.  If you choose to purchase from a breeder, take time to make sure the breeder is reputable and complies with AKC standards. Alternatively, you can choose to adopt a dog from your local shelter or rescue group. If you decide to look at your local shelter, do not be dismayed if they do not have your desired breed.  You can talk to the shelter workers and give them your information and what you are looking for and they can contact you if that certain breed comes available. Rescue groups are a great place to find a dog for your family because many of them are breed specific.  Also, the staff at rescue groups routinely places their dogs in foster homes, to get a better understanding of the dog’s likes and dislikes and temperament.  Most dogs in breed specific rescues are past puppy age, usually adults, however for some families this can be a blessing as they are past the common puppy behaviors such as chewing, potty training, and not sleeping through the night.

By taking the time to look at your family’s lifestyle, desires, and needs, you can get a better idea of what you are looking for in a dog.  Then you can take that list and compare it to your research to find the dog that will blend in with your family’s environment the best.  Spending a little extra time researching the breed that is best for you will increase your family’s success in finding the right dog that will be a life long match.  As always, remember that despite breed, each dog may have its own unique personality traits and behaviors.

Tainted Tolerance

Have you noticed how lately the term tolerance has become overused to the point where its very definition has become twisted and abused? It seems that most conservative and Christian individuals find themselves staring down the barrel of so called 'tolerance' time and time again.

According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, tolerance is defined as the, "willingness to accept feelings, habits, or beliefs that are different from your own". However, today that doesn't seem to ring true when Christians are continually being attacked for voicing their own personal opinions and beliefs.

This has most recently been seen in the public outcry that is occurring after Duck Dynasty member Phil Robertson was indefinitely banned from future episodes as a result of an interview with GQ in which he gave his personal opinion on homosexuality.

It seems to me that the word tolerance is taking on a completely new definition that means following the beliefs of the liberals and mainstream media. Since when is it acceptable to deem someones personal opinion as flawed or wrong? Personal opinions are just that...personal. They vary from person to person. Everyone is entitled to have their own beliefs, thoughts, and mindset regardless of what the rest of America feels.

For the record, I am a conservative and a Christian woman. I believe that marriage should be between a man and a woman as God himself designed and intended it. I am against abortion and I believe that every life is sacred. Am I not allowed to have my personal opinion because it doesn't conform with liberal propaganda?

Our founding fathers recognized the need that individuals have in their right to have their personal beliefs and opinions as it is known in our first amendment. Why then, is our America now taking on such a tainted view of tolerance?

The answer is that as a society we have compromised too much. Too many times instead of standing up for what we believe we have laid quiet so that we don't offend anyone. Too many times have we looked the other way at an injustice, because what can just one person do? Too many times we have allowed the line of morality and values to be constantly pushed farther to stay 'socially accepted.' We have tried to make everyone else around us comfortable by compromising our own standards and beliefs.

The truth of the matter is as Christians, we are not going to have the same values and beliefs as much of the rest of the world. Christ didn't die for our sins so we would be comfortable and follow the world's ways. He died to free us from the sin we tangled ourselves in. Sins like putting the world's standards above God's standard. We are called to be DIFFERENT! We are called to stand out, to be the light in the dark, to speak the truth even when it's not socially acceptable, and we may lose some friends along the way. I am so thankful that my God is a bold God who gave His very life to save me.

Now it's our turn to be bold for Him. It's our turn to let our voices, beliefs, and convictions be heard no matter the consequence. This doesn't mean hating people or lifestyles that are different from us either. It doesn't mean accepting their lifestyle. It just means that regardless of who they are, what their lifestyle is, or what they believe, we are going to show them Christ's love. We have to remember, Christ loved them enough to die for them to.

It's not our job to convict anyone or pass judgement. We will all have to stand before God one day and account for ourselves. However, while we are here, it is time to get out of our comfort zone and be bold for God, to take our stand with Him even if it does make us less popular with the rest of the world.

How are you going to be bold for God today?

Overcoming Caregiver Stress

            Have you ever been in the situation where you suddenly found yourself the sole caregiver of a loved one that suffers from a debilitating disease? Perhaps you went from being a career professional, a student, or even a stay at home parent, to becoming solely responsible for the care and wellness of another individual.

            Almost overnight, your entire family dynamic has changed as your loved one moves in with you and requires nearly round the clock care.  This commonly involves constant supervision to ensure that they do not injure themselves or others.  Common caretaker responsibilities include assistance with almost every facet of their life from eating, bathing, dressing, medication upkeep, doctor’s appointments, and countless other day-to-day responsibilities.

            If this sounds like you, fear not, you are not alone! Currently, according to the Alzheimer’s Association, there are more than fifteen million caretakers in the United States right now, many of which provide care for patients that suffer from Alzheimer’s or Dementia related diseases (Alzheimer's Association).With the current influx of patients opting to forego nursing home care in favor of being cared for by their family members, this can sometimes create a great deal of stress for caregivers as they work to maintain the balance between caring for their loved one, while still meeting their own family and possibly work responsibilities.

            Caregivers of any sort are faced with many challenges, but when caring for an Alzheimer’s or Dementia patient, sometimes the challenges can prove to be increasingly difficult, and if not corrected, caregivers can be faced with an overwhelming level of stress that can prove to be too much to handle.  The first step to treating stress among caregivers is to be able to effectively recognize it.

            Although stress can appear in different ways to each person, the most common emotional symptoms of stress are increased levels of anxiety, frustration, and depression. Physically, this can be manifested in having trouble sleeping at night, loss of appetite, increased headaches, or even chest pain (Symptoms of Stress, 2013). Left unchecked, according to The American Institute of Stress, high stress levels can lead to a host of problems such as high blood pressure, increased risk of sudden stroke or heart attack, even possibly being more susceptible to certain forms of cancer (The American Institute of Stress, 2013).

            Caregivers that find themselves stressed or experiencing any of these problems need to recognize the need to take time to properly care for themselves.  I can hear many of you saying now, that sounds like a great idea, but who has time to take a break?  This is a full time commitment!  The key is understanding that stressed out caregivers are unhealthy caregivers, and unhealthy caregivers cannot provide the best level of care for their family members, much less themselves.

            The next step to treating stress is coming up with a plan of action and sticking to it.  One of the easiest methods to reduce stress and take time for yourself is to set boundaries with your loved one in terms of time limits.  Commonly, Alzheimer’s and Dementia patients get confused very easily which leads to their need to be reassured multiple times every day, and in some cases they fear being left alone, even if it is just in the other room.  Even with good intentions, one person, no matter how hard they may try, cannot be on call twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.  You will burn out and will not be a help to anyone that way.  Instead, by setting time limits with your loved one, you are able to effectively balance their need for companionship with your own family and time for yourself.

In certain cases, your loved one may require supervision constantly to ensure they are not a threat to themselves or others.  This is where the caregiver must enlist support. Having an effective support system is crucial to being an effective caregiver. Caregivers may find support from other family members, friends, or even a senior sitting service.  Whoever it is, make sure they are fully up to date on the situation and can fill in for you if you need a few hours away to yourself…and believe me…you are going to need it!

Lastly, look around your area for local Alzheimer’s Association chapters or caregiver support groups.  Both of these avenues can prove to be an invaluable asset in your journey as a caretaker as they can provide further education related to the disorder or disease your loved one is facing, community referrals to programs that may assist you, or even caregiver support groups that meet monthly and address concerns and issues that caregivers commonly face.  If your area does not currently have a caregiver support group in place, do not get discouraged.  With more individuals becoming caregivers each day, chances are there are plenty of caregivers in your area that you just have not connected with yet.  Be open to connecting with local churches and even home health agencies that could potentially put you in touch with other families that are going through similar situations you are.  Above all else, remember the primary rule of being an effective caregiver; take time to care for yourself, because an unhealthy caregiver leads to an unhealthy patient.

By putting in place these simple strategies and utilizing the help of a support system, caregivers can ensure that they are not forgetting to take care of themselves in hopes to reduce stress.  In addition, when caregivers take the time to connect with others that are in similar situations, they are able to build relationships and cultivate friendships that have a comradery that is unique to caregivers because they share many of the same experiences.  For many caregivers, the friendships they find through support groups prove to last a lifetime and enrich both the caregivers and the patient’s lives. 

 

Beating the Christmas Blues

Tis the season for snowy days, sparkling Christmas trees, winter break, and perpetually happy children right?  Wrong!  If your children are anything like mine, they spend all year looking forward in excitement to Christmas break and the holiday season, only to join in a chorus of the Christmas blues within a day or two of being out of school.  Before you know it, the excitement of being on break wears off and the I’m bored blues set in!

As every parent knows, the Christmas season can hit wallets hard as it is one of the most commercialized holidays of the year, so how can parents keep their children entertained without breaking the bank?  Although it sounds like a daunting problem, it can be solved with a little initiative and dash of creativity!

To help fellow Moms and Dads out there looking for a lifeline to help beat the Christmas blues, I have put together a list of twenty fun and low cost activities that the whole family can enjoy this Christmas season!  To make it even more special, sit down with your family, go over the list of Christmas activities, and have a vote of what sounds like the most fun!  That way everyone will feel like they are included in the decision making process!

Christmas Activities

1. Bake, bake, bake!  Christmas is known for whipping up sweet confections such as Christmas cookies, candies, and pies.  Children get a thrill in helping out in the kitchen, especially when they get to show off their handiwork.  To make it even more interesting perhaps you can invite over family and friends and have a cookie-decorating contest!
2. Christmas movie night!  Bundle up in your favorite Christmas pajamas, break out the cocoa, and settle in for a fun movie night!  Some popular Christmas movies for kids are, The Polar Express, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, A Charlie Brown Christmas, It’s a Wonderful Life, and countless others!
3. Play in the snow!  If you live in a snowy area, what better fun than to have a good old-fashioned snowball fight!  Other popular fun snowy day activities are making snow angels, a snowman, or even going sledding.
4. Visit a tree farm.  If you live Christmas trees, bring the children along!  They will have a ton of fun racing up and down the rows hunting down the perfect tree!  Even if you opt for an artificial tree, a tree farm can still be a ton of fun as they routinely sell decorations and often have hot cocoa and apple cider on hand.
5. Adopt a family through Angel Tree.  One of the best activities that you can do with your children through the Christmas season is to teach them to give back to those less fortunate.  Angel Tree is just one of many charitable organizations that allow you to ‘adopt’ a family for Christmas.
6. Volunteer!  In the spirit of giving back, call up local soup kitchens, animal shelters, or even churches to see if they need any extra help.  Many times, with cold weather moving in, there are more needs for food distribution, jacket and coat drives, and countless other ways to get involved in your community.  This is a great way to gently remind children how blessed they are.
7. Visit a live nativity.  Many churches nowadays are offering live nativities that you can either drive or walk through.  This is a great activity that is fun for all ages and puts the true reason for the season in perspective.
8. Build a gingerbread house!  A family tradition in our house that our children look forward to each year is building and decorating their own gingerbread houses!
9. Elf on the shelf.  One newly popular tradition many families are embracing is elf on the shelf.  Although this is more geared towards younger children, older children can get involved as well by helping come up with new ‘elf scenarios’.
10. Candlelight Christmas service.  Many churches have Christmas candlelight services that are filled with carols, the Christmas story, and fellowship for all.  For my family, the candlelight Christmas service has become one of our favorite traditions.
11. Create a care package for a solider!  This is a great way to give back and encourage those who can’t be home with their families during the Christmas season.  Possible ideas to include are hot chocolate mix, toiletries, individually wrapped Christmas candies, and a card expressing your family’s thanks for their service.
12. Breakfast with Santa!  This time-honored tradition is offered frequently throughout the Christmas season and is usually always free.  Check your local newspaper as many community centers, YMCA’s, and farmers markets routinely have Santa visits.
13. Christmas light shows.  Although this is not free, it is usually low cost.  Popular Christmas light shows are often set up in botanical gardens, parks, or even sometimes along the boardwalk at the oceanfront depending on where you live.  Check your local newspaper or radio stations for more information on what is available in your area.
14. Christmas night rides.  A free alternative to Christmas light shows is hopping in your car, taking a ride through various neighborhoods, and checking out the lights.  Some neighborhoods collaborate together and even have luminary displays.
15. Night adventures!  This is a classic tradition that my family does all year round, but during the Christmas season, it seems especially special.  On a weekend night when you don’t have to wake up early the next day, after the kids fall asleep for a few hours, wake them up and surprise them with an adventure!  It can be just riding and seeing the lights or even bundling up and hitting the nearest IHOP for some Christmas pancakes!  Children love it as the magic to them is having an adventure while the rest of the world is sleeping.
16. Host a Christmas party for your family and friends.  Children love to help plan special events and have their input recognized.  Bring the whole family together and plan a party together, letting everyone in on choosing the guest list, to party food, activities and games, and decorations.
17. Go Christmas caroling!  This is a great activity and can be done just as a family or part of a group such as with a church group.  Popular spots to carol are through your neighborhood, nearby residents of a nursing home, or hospitals.
18. Bring Christmas cookies to your local first responders.  Nothing shows appreciation more than letting your local first responders know that you value their services.  Many times, they are working throughout the entire Christmas season and miss this special time with their own families, so it’s a great way to show that you care.
19. Open one present on Christmas Eve!  This is another tradition my children look forward to each year.  Many times, we will put together a Christmas box for each child containing their favorite Christmas snacks, a small toy or book, and one pair of Christmas pajamas.  They love the excitement of getting to open one present early, and the Christmas pajamas makes for wonderful pictures on Christmas morning.
20. Have a Christmas tree sleepover!  Nothing is more magical than falling asleep watching the twinkling lights of your Christmas tree surrounded by your family.  Even for older children, this is a tradition they won’t soon forget!

There are countless other activities that your family can participate in during the Christmas season, this is just a list to get you started.  Whatever you choose to do, make it something special for your family that you can keep going for years to come so you always have fond memories to look back upon.  Feel free to comment below with your own favorite Christmas activities and traditions!

Merry Christmas!

Meet Aspen and Luka!

                              Meet Aspen and Luka!

Love to snuggle!

Aspen and Luka were found last year right before Isaac.  They have both been neutered, have their rabies vaccine, and are on Advantage monthly flea control.  They are bonded to each other, so they would need to be adopted together.  They are good around other cats, dogs, and small children.

What a beauty!

 Aspen is the white cat and has one blue eye and one green eye.  He is very laid back and relaxed and his favorite playtime activity is the laser light!  Luka, the smaller gray cat, LOVES to be around people.  He is happiest when he is curled up on a friendly lap with lots of love. Both cats are inside cats and must remain inside pets. 

Fast Friends!

If interested in giving these two love bugs a forever home, please contact Jerri Singley at 228-355-0954 or jerrilynsingley@yahoo.com for an adoption application.

Breed Specific Legislation

Like many families across the world, our family is big time animal lovers. We have four pets; one dog and three cats. All have been rescues. We are firmly committed that is much better to rescue and adopt pets as opposed to buying them from breeders and pet shops.

 As animal lovers, we find it very troubling when we hear stories of animal abuse, neglect, and injustice. Like many, we recently heard about the heartbreaking story of Lennox who was a Labrador and American Bulldog mix that was heartlessly euthanized in Belfast on July 11, 2012 in accordance with their Breed Specific Laws.


 In Lennox's story, he was targeted because of his appearance and that he 'resembled' a pit bull. Lennox was actually a service dog to a chronically ill child and had never bitten anyone or exhibited aggressive behavior. Despite numerous pleas from dog advocates around the world to provide sanctuary for the dog, Belfast taunted the family by not allowing the family to even say goodbye to their beloved pet and euthanized him.

 The problem with Breed Specific Legislation is that it unfairly targets breeds based on preconceived notions and myths. Many times, individuals believe that certain breeds are just born aggressive, such as pit bulls, rottweilers, and other large breeds. The reality is, the problem is not with the breed, but rather in how the dog is raised.

 Breed Specific Legislation or BSL as it is more commonly known is set on wiping out breeds that they feel are harmful to society. In fact, much like Lennox's story, a dog does not have to be a pit bull but simply resemble one.


 Instead of creating laws that work to eliminate breeds, new legislation should be enacted that targets the owners. Responsible dog owners will raise responsible dogs. By going after individuals who operate dog fighting rings, abuse animals, and do not properly take care of their pets, much of the misconception regarding 'bully breeds' can be laid to rest.

 Although fighting Breed Specific Legislation is a large scale issue, there are many things that you can do easily to help raise awareness that BSL is not the answer.

First, educate yourself on BSL in your area. BSL laws vary not only from state to state, but county to county as well. It is important to find out if your area is affected and there is a ban on certain breeds.

Secondly, start writing your mayors, lawmakers, politicians, and animal rescue groups and share your position and ideas on how to reform the law and bring about positive change. It is important to note when writing, make sure that you do so in a classy and tasteful manner. Temper, slurs, and slander will not get your point across any faster but simply get your letter in the trash. Your letters can include solutions to better regulate dog owners, increase awareness regarding safer interactions between dogs and society, or even enforcing leash laws more. Whatever your point is in the fight against BSL, make sure that it is not lost in a fury of anger.

 Lastly, find a shelter and rescue group and get out there and volunteer. Many of the animals that are put down are in shelters and they just need someone to take a chance on them. Many times, shelters and rescue groups have low cost spay/neuter programs that are always looking for volunteers to help educate and increase awareness. Most dogs that have been violent are adults that have not been spayed or neutered and have been trained to be that way.


Wherever you are, no matter your age, you can take a stand and fight against BSL and be a voice for those that cannot speak for themselves.

It is incomprehensible to punish an entire breed based on looks, myths, and hype. As many have stated before, punish the deed and not the breed.

 For more information on BSL, check out Help me Put an End to Breed Specific Legislation.

Stay informed and if you hear about any families currently fighting to keep their dog from being euthanized under BSL, please let me know so we can increase awareness!

Until next time!

Chick-Fil-A Controversy

By now, just about everyone has heard about the firestorm Chick-fil-a is currently in when the restaurant President Dan Cathy took a stand against gay marriage stating that they are “supportive of family-the Biblical definition of the family unit.” Naturally, this created an onset of media attacks and fury from many people. What amazes me in this story is the hypocrisy of the entire situation. Since when is it not ok to stand up for what you believe in? Not everyone in this country is going to agree on everything, but that does not mean that they do not have the right to voice their opinion.

 In fact, some of the individuals currently against Chick-fil-a have been downright tasteless in their comments and show their lack of class all together such as Roseanne Barr’s comment that “anyone who eats Chick-fil-a (I omitted the slur) deserves to get the cancer.” On top of that, even government officials such as Democratic politician Rahm Emanuel have stated that he will use the government to “punish Chick-fil-a.” Even the Mayor of Boston, Massachusetts, Thomas Menino is working to block Chick-fil-a from opening a location in their city.

Personally, I commend Chick-fil-a for standing up for what they believe in. I’m sure individuals who do lead gay/lesbian/transgender/bisexual lifestyles are proud of themselves for standing up for their beliefs, so why is it not acceptable for someone else to do the same? Chick-fil-a is not discriminating against them by refusing to serve or hire them, but simply saying they see marriage differently. Chick-fil-a has a long history of building its business on integrity and Biblical principals; and in this country we are blessed to have the freedom of speech and religion. These freedoms are not only for a select few, but for everyone, REGARDLESS of race, creed, gender, or sexual orientation.

 In a world where we are so focused on anti-bullying tactics, can everyone not see what this really is? It is nothing more than large scale bullying by adults who are supposed to be able to set examples to the younger generation in how to treat others. What kind of message do you think our children are learning? They are learning that if someone does not agree with you, it is ok to publically attack them and attempt to ‘punish’ them until they conform to the standards that someone else has deemed acceptable.

 I’m sure that I will get some flack for this post, but I’m not too concerned with that. I think that if we spent more of our time building others up and respecting each other, no matter which side of the fence we are on when it comes to important issues like this, we would all be setting a much better example for our children and society around us.

The bottom line is this: Chick-fil-a has done nothing wrong to deserve such a negative outcry from the public and government officials. Personally, I agree with the Biblical version of marriage, but I would never say that someone who believes different needed to be ‘punished’ or slandered. It is my thought that everyone does love, kindness, and respect. Treat others the way you would want to be treated.  Plain and simple.

Just some food for thought!

Time Flies!

Hey everyone! It has been quite awhile since I last blogged! Wow, there is so much to catch up on! Well for starters, we are now living in Slidell, Louisiana. We moved to Louisiana in March of 2012 after many months of prayer and deliberation. We wanted to move South to be closer to my Grandmother and we also felt that this was where God was leading us. It was really hard to leave our church and our friends that we had made in Virginia but we know that this is something that we just have to do. We haven't found a house yet, so we are temporarily staying in our RV until we can get approved and find a house that meets our family's needs. It definitely can be a bit stressful, after all there are five of us and spaces are cramped, but we are confident that in God's time, the right door will be opened. Just to give you an idea of how much God has all ready moved since we have been here, the first day we arrived in Slidell (we visited with my husband's dad in Alabama first) my husband got a great job. Then, after working for a few months, my husbands boss gave us a minivan free and clear. We decided to put the boys temporarily in public school as opposed to homeschooling since we are living in the RV and small spaces make things difficult. So far they like their school and are looking forward to going back in a few weeks when school starts up again. Once we find a house, we will make the decision if we are going to continue public school or homeschool again. The boys seem to really enjoy both, so we'll see what happens. I have been staying very busy with school. I'm majoring in Criminal Justice and should graduate with my bachelors degree in 2014. It seems like so far away but I'm trying to stay focused and take one class at a time. Well, that is pretty much the gist of everything, and I will definitely try to keep my blog much more active in the months to come! Have a great day!

Beginner's Guide to Couponing

Since I have started couponing, I have had many friends ask for pointers in how you get started. It's really pretty easy and it's alot of fun! Plus, you save money which is always a good thing!

To start off, any couponer should know 'The Coupon Lingo.' There is a bunch, but instead of overwhelm you with a whole list, I'll give you the most frequently used.

BOGO or B1G1- Buy one Get one Free
CAT- Short for Catalina coupon that prints at the register after your purchase
DND- Do not Double
IP- Internet Printable
MQ- Manufacturer's Coupon
MIR- Mail in Rebate
PG- Proctor and Gamble Insert
RC- Rain Check
RP- Red Plum
SS- Smart Source
STACKING- Using a store specific coupon with a manufacturer coupon. (For example a Target coupon with a manufacturer coupon.)

These are the coupon abbreviations that you will see the most, however if you would like the full list let me know and I'll be sure to post it!

When you're ready to start couponing, I suggest getting a zip up binder with baseball card or business card clear inserts. I started with a three ring binder that I quickly outgrew and I also ran the risk of if it was ever dropped, all my coupons falling out....not a encouraging thought! I am now using a five star zip up binder that I have separated into sections.


You can separate your coupon binder any way that works for you. Some have done it by food/product type, while others have their books organized by a specific store's aisle layout.



Personally, I separate mine by product type instead of a specific store layout. The downside of using a store aisle layout is that your coupon book will really only work at that one store. I can take my coupon book to any store, and find the coupon that I need quickly and efficiently. Efficiency is a good thing to have when there are plenty of other couponers at the same store, all going for the same sale items! There are also a few basic supplies you should keep in your binder. For starters, a pair of small scissors. You never know when you might find a coupon that needs clipping! Also, you should pack a calculator, pen/pencil, small notebook, and I like to keep one of the older small adjustable coupon packs with me.



The notebook is great for when I do my Farm Fresh shopping trips. One of the great thing about Farm Fresh is that they have no customer loyalty program. Many see this as a downside, but I have made it work to my advantage. Farm Fresh allows you to double up to twenty coupons each Wednesday per transaction. So when I find a really great deal, I split up my transactions so I can exceed the twenty doubling coupons without violating their store policy. When you have a basket (or two!) filled it can be very easy to lose track of what is supposed to go in each transaction with the right coupons. My notebook allows me to keep track of exactly what needs to go where and the adjustable coupon book helps me to organize my coupons for checkout. For example, as I am couponing, all my transaction one coupons will be in the first section, transaction two coupons in the second section, and so on. This has saved me so much of a headache in my checkout--and believe me, I learned this the hard way!

Now that you have your coupon binder and supplies, you need to get some coupons! There are plenty of places to find coupons! For starters, it is usually a great idea to get a subscription to your local paper. I have a Wednesday and Sunday subscription of two papers. This gives me double coupons on Sundays, and on Wednesdays my sale ads are in so gives me the morning to plan my trip. Other places you can find coupons are magazines. The 'All You' magazine has coupons in it each month, and although I don't have a subscription to it yet, I am looking to sign up soon! Many times you can find some coupons on actual products themselves that you can peel or cut out later. Also, you can ask your friends and family if they wouldn't mind sending you some coupons. There are coupon clipping services, but the downside is you have to pay for them, and if you're anything like me, I love what I can get for free! Coupon Groups are great in exchanging coupons with others. On Facebook, I have started The Coupon Corner where you can trade and exchange coupons, and there is even a few couponing trains showing up. Facebook has been great in finding coupons! Many companies are on Facebook and if you 'like' their page you will be in the first to know for coupons or promotions they are having. There are also many great 'deal' sites on Facebook that will let you know of free samples, coupons, and promotions. One of my favorites on Facebook is Freebies for Friends and The Coupon Consultant. Freebies for Friends is great at putting the word out for the latest freebies and occasionally takes parts in giveaways! The Coupon Consultant is my go to guide for my weekly Wednesday Farm Fresh Trips! I love that she is local so her prices are exact! She gives me a rundown on what's on sale, which coupons to use, and what my final price should be. The Coupon Consultant has made my shopping trips so much easier!! If you're not a Farm Fresh shopper like me, she does cover other grocery stores as well!

As you get into couponing, you may find some couponing phrases that are pretty confusing. The first is the DND or Do Not Double (or Triple.) When I first started couponing, I hated Do Not Double coupons until I learned a trick. If the UPC starts with a '5' the register doesn't know that it's not supposed to double so many times it will still double. However, if the UPC starts with a '9' the register will not double the coupon. Most times, when you hand your stack of coupons to the cashier they aren't checking ever single coupon, but still take it with a grain of salt--this might not always work!

The next phrase that can be confusing is One Coupon per Purchase. Many people think that this means they are allowed to use only one coupon per transaction. Not so! It means you are not allowed to use more than one manufacturer coupon per item. You can still stack your coupons with one store coupon and one manufacturer coupon, but you cannot use two manufacturer coupons on the same item.

Lastly, the next most common phrase that causes confusion is when dealing with 'like coupons' Many stores have restrictions on how many 'like coupons' you can use. This means how many duplicate coupons you can use. For example, let's say I have several coupons for French's mustard. I have four .50 off one bottle of French's mustard. I can use two of my .50 off coupons in one transaction. To use the other two French's mustard coupons I would have to start up a separate transaction.

When you begin couponing, I suggest picking out one to two stores at most to start off because it can be overwhelming. Many stores have different policies so in the beginning you will want to start small. Make sure you print out your coupon policies, and have them with you when you shop, that way if there's a problem, you have the policy at hand.

Next, make sure you have a list! When I first started couponing, I was not good with making lists, so I would spend way too much time in the grocery stores without a clear plan of what I was getting. I just knew I had coupons and I wanted to save! Now, thanks to The Coupon Consultant, I am able to get my match ups Wednesday mornings before I go to the store so I have a pretty good idea of what I'm getting. There will always be some things you find at a great deal that weren't on your list and that's ok, but it is very important to have a list to at least start.

As your shopping, you will occasionally come across products that are out of stock. If the item is listed in their sale paper and is out of stock, you are able to get a rain check. Rain check's can be a couponers saving grace! Rain checks allow you to lock in the price of the sale for you until they are back in stock. Check your store's policy as some stores rain checks expire while others do not. Farm Fresh rain checks are good for one month. I love rain checks because although I didn't get the product I wanted that day, I know I am most likely not going to have to rush to beat someone else out to get it as I have a whole month to get it. Rain checks can be obtained through the customer service desk---which by the way they will become your new best friends at your grocery store!

The more I couponed, the better I got at it! Remember, any savings is a WIN! Don't be discouraged if you are not pulling off great hauls like you have seen on Extreme Couponing, that is not reality. (See previous blog for more info on this)

Most importantly, have fun, be courtious to others, and if you happen to get a ton of an item, don't be afraid to be someones blessing!

Acts 20:35- In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’

Farm Fresh Trip 6/8/2011

Just about everyone has seen the TLC show Extreme Couponing and has an opinion on it. Personally, I love the idea, but the show really isn't true to reality. The couponers on Extreme Couponing walk out of the grocery stores with gigantic hauls and pay literally nothing. The downside is they end up hoarding tons of things, clear the shelves, and give other couponers a bad name.

The reality is, we will never be able to coupon like they do on the show. The reason for that is they are able to use coupons in a way that is against most of America's store coupon policies. Each store has their own coupon policy that limits consumers to how many coupons that you can use that will double or triple and how many like coupons you can use.

For instance, at Farm Fresh, my local grocery store, I can double coupons up to $1.00 on Wednesdays but not to exceed twenty coupons that will double. Also, I can only have two like coupons. That right there puts a very big question mark on the validity of the Extreme Couponing Show. Many of their couponers will buy hundreds of the same product with a coupon for each one. Again, most stores have a policy of only two or three like coupons.

I have come to believe that although the Extreme Couponing show is interesting and it did get me into couponing, it really sets people up to fail. I have found so many people that started couponing and are saving 50% off their grocery bill each visit upset because they are not in the 90% range as shown on TV. In my opinion, if you are saving anything, it's a blessing! I generally save in between 30% to 70% each trip. Sure, I would rather see the higher percentage than a low one, but any savings is helpful! My biggest advice for anyone who is new to couponing or discouraged is to be proud of yourself no matter what the percentage is on your receipt. You're working hard to provide extra savings for your family and that's a win! You will get better the longer you coupon so let it be something you enjoy!

My most recent trip to Farm Fresh on June 8th, I was able to do pretty well. I had 19 doubling coupons and 1 $5 off coupon just for signing up for the Farm Fresh email newsletter. I also utilized the $5 off promotion if I purchased an assortment of any ten products they had on sale.

Here's the breakdown of what I got during my first Farm Fresh trip:

2 boxes of Cheerios
2 boxes of Reeces Puffs
2 boxes of Fruit Roll Ups
1 box of Fruit by the Foot
2 boxes of Duncan Hines cake mix
2 cans of Duncan Hines frosting
2 Duncan Hines brownie mixes (free)
2 tubes of Crest toothpaste
6 boxes of Hamburger Helper
4 bags of Quaker Rice Cakes
1 bottle of Garnier Fructis Shampoo
4 bottles of Kens Salad Dressing
2 bottles of Kikkoman Soy Sauce
2 bottles of KC Masterpiece BBQ Sauce (free)
2 boxes of Ronzoni Pasta (if my store allowed overage this would have been .31 credit per box)



My total before coupons was $67.36. After my coupons, I paid only $23.38 out of pocket. My savings were $43.98 which is a 66% savings. I ended up going back later that day since I had a surplus of coupons for items on sale so by the end of the day my total savings for everything I bought that day came out to be $201.99 before coupons and I finished the day spending only $97.85 which saved me $104.14.

It's not the 90% that you see on television, but for me it's a success! I'd love to hear how you guys are doing couponing and what your tricks of the trade are! Feel free to share your experiences!

Happy Couponing!!

Find Your Staycation!

As a follow-up to The Era of Staycations, here is a list of other bloggers across the country that participated in this year's Staycation challenge. Be sure to check for your area and see what great ideas we have come up with! If your area wasn't covered, no worries--the challenge is up to you! You might be surprised at how many amazing and affordable adventures you can find in your city! Be sure to check back with us and let us know what great staycation ideas you come up with!

Happy Travels!


New England


Connecticut - Parenting Miracles
Boston, Massachusetts - ‎ Maven of Savin'
Manchester, New Hampshire - Common Sense with Money
Western Maine - Bubblegum and Lollipops


Mid-Atlantic


Erie, Pennsylvania - Growing Kids Ministry
Gettysburg, Pennsylvania - Somewhat Crunchy
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania - Family Balance Sheet
Buffalo/Niagara Falls, New York - Coupons, Deals and More
New Jersey - Oh! Diane


Midwest


Cedar Rapids, Iowa - Indoor Garden Musings
Mansfield, Ohio - Live the Adventure
Cincinnati, Ohio - Savings Lifestyle~Cincinnati
Mount Vernon, Ohio - Living Better One Day at a Time
Dayton, Ohio - Savings Lifestyle~Dayton
Grand Rapids, Michigan - Kitchen Stewardship
Metro Detroit, Michigan - "Cents"able Momma
Oakland County, Michigan - Bargain Shopper Mom
Warren, Michigan - Saving Dollars and Sense
Grand Forks, North Dakota - Frugal Front Porch
Indianapolis, Indiana - Bargain Briana
South Bend, Indiana - Excuse The Mess
Kansas City, Kansas/Missouri - Kansas City Mamas
St. Louis, Missouri - The Pickledpigsfeet
Branson, Missouri - Getting Freedom from Debt
Springfield, Missouri - I Think I Can
Rochester, Minnesota - Everyday Notions
York, Nebraska - Heavenly Homemakers
Omaha, Nebraska - Mom Endeavors
Madison, Wisconsin - Many Little Blessings
Oshkosh, Wisconsin - A Little Bit of This and That
Chicago, Illinois - Chicagoland Homeschool Network
Champaign, Illinois - Chambanamoms
Black Hills, South Dakota - Little House on the Prairie Living


South Central


Checotah, Oklahoma - Blessed With One Income
Tulsa, Oklahoma - Lynn's Kitchen Adventures
Gadsden, Alabama - Aint Mimi
Dallas, Texas - Funky Faith Girl
Dallas, Texas - Grocery Shop For FREE
East Dallas, Texas - Surviving The Stores
Fort Worth, Texas - Smockity Frocks
Austin, Texas - Stetted
Houston, Texas - Moms Travel Tales
McKinney, Texas - Wisdom Begun
East Texas - The Full Pantry
Murfreesboro, Tennessee - Life in a Barn
Nashville, Tennessee - The Country Chic Cottage
Mobile, Alabama - A Penny Saved is a Penny Earned
Birmingham, Alabama - iGoBOGO
Brunswick & the Golden Isles, Georgia - Teri Lynne Underwood
Alpharetta, Georgia - Cuponeando
Atlanta, Georgia - See Jamie Blog
Augusta, Georgia - Hyperactive Lu
Athens, Georgia and Mississippi - Tractors and Tire Swings
Little Rock, Arkansas - It's Real Life


South Atlantic


Ft. Bragg, North Carolina - Military Wives Saving
Charlotte, North Carolina - The Carolina Clipper
Charleston, South Carolina - The Tween & Me
Greensboro, North Carolina - Mrs. Happy Homemaker
Jacksonville, Florida - Saving The Family Money
Orlando, Florida - Orlando's Best Deals
Virginia Beach, Virginia - The Singley Fam Blog
Richmond, Virginia - Daily Dwelling
Hampton Roads, Virginia - A Home Made by Kiki
Charlottesville, Virginia - How to Have it All
Blackwater Falls State Park/Davis, West Virginia - Holy Spirit Led Homeschooling
Treasure Coast, Florida - The Cardamom's Pod
Saint Augustine, Florida - Jypsie Visions
Lake Norman, North Carolina - Stretching Pennies Saving Dollars
Washington, DC - The WiC Project
Baltimore, Maryland - The Happy Housewife
Brunswick & Golden Isles, Georgia - Terri Lynne Underwood



Mountain


Tucson, Arizona - Saving with Pam
Phoenix, Arizona- Mom Endeavors
Albuquerque, New Mexico - The Chou Life
Kalispell, Montana - Our Family Adventures
Salt Lake City, Utah - Just the 2 of Us
Thermopolis, Wyoming - The McDonald Family
Denver, Colorado - Denver Bargains
Colorado Springs, Colorado - Colorado Springs Bargains


Pacific


San Diego, California - Life As Mom
Yosemite National Park, California -Handbook of Nature Study
Seattle, Washington - Queen Bee Coupons & Savings
Whidbey Island, Washington - Manning the Homefront
Olympia, Washington The Coupon Savant
Portland, Oregon - Frugal Living NW
Willamette Valley, Oregon - An Oregon Cottage


Frugal Vacation Tips


Vacation or Stay-cation: Eating without Busting the Budget - Eat at Home